Do you compare your physique to others? Do you wish you were as muscular or as ripped as someone else?
If so, don’t worry. You’re not alone. We’re all guilty of it.
There were times when I wish my chest and calves were as big as a fellow bro. Sometimes I would really let it get to me. I’d catch myself wondering why they were able to grow so big and so fast, when I’ve had to fight tooth and nail for every ounce of gains.
Sometimes, I’d become inspired by a fellow Physique Artist’s progress. Their success would fuel my fire and I’d step up my game BIG TIME! But more times than I’d like to admit I would experience feelings of jealousy, frustration, and anger.
This week I came across two posts on social media in regards to the topic of comparing ourselves to others.
They provided me with some food for thought, causing me to pause and reflect on my own transformation journey… Where I’ve been, where I am, and where I am heading.
I began to ponder my own unique greatness and the unique mark I want to make on this world. My legacy.
The first post I came across was from my buddy Tom Venuto. He shared an image, which was an excerpt from the goal setting chapter of his book, Burn The Fat Feed The Muscle…
Those words jumped off the page at me. The message resonated deep within me.
It had me thinking about how I’ve looked at my co-host of the Modern Musclehead Podcast, Bryan Krahn who’s got 40-50 pounds on me and I may have wished that my calves and rear delts were as big as his.
But after training with him, I was shocked to hear that he wished his shoulders and arms were bigger.
Even the big 280 pound BEASTS out there are comparing themselves to each other, wishing they were bigger.
What I’ve realized now more than ever, is that the bigger bros I was comparing myself to were also comparing themselves to others who were even more cut and jacked.
So, if I’m striving to be like someone else and eventually achieve that goal, I may still feel unsatisfied and not muscular enough. There’s always someone better. Comparing yourself to others is a trap. A bottomless pit.
Not to mention that we’re only seeing a glimpse of these BEASTS overall lifestyle. You don’t see the sacrifices they are making to achieve their goals, some of which may be in conflict with your core values.
They may have 100 pounds more muscle than you, but are they happy? Do they feel fulfilled? Are they healthy and vibrant?
On the other end of the spectrum there are some people who appear to effortlessly stay ripped all year round, even when they are in muscle building mode.
Again, some of these people may think that they aren’t lean enough and wish they were as shredded as some other freak (and I mean that in the most endearing way possible) out there.
You also only get a glimpse of their lifestyle. Their hormones may be out of whack. They may feel exhausted all the time. They may be spending all their free time in the gym while relationships suffer.
I clearly remember conversations I had with my fellow fitness enthusiasts back when I began my transformation process over five years ago. They frequently told me that they wish they had a physique like mine, even though I was 40-45 pounds fatter than what I am today.
I was shocked to hear this, since I felt lethargic, my self confidence was at an all time low, I felt disconnected with my purpose and passion, I didn’t feel attractive, and I felt like a fraud since I wasn’t practicing what I preached. How could they possibly want to be like me when I feel like crap?
The grass is not always greener on the other side.
That brings me to the next thing I came across on social media, which was an image shared by Jon Goodman of the Personal Trainer Development Centre.
Jon shared a picture of grass on Instagram with the quote, “I’m too busy working on my own grass to notice if yours is greener.”
I loved the quote so much that I decided to create some images of my own, using pictures of my dog Chief and cat Charlie…
Yes, I love my pets 😉
What I take away from this quote is that if you focus your time and effort on your own personal growth and development, on making the absolute most out of the unique gifts that you’ve been granted while striving for your personal potential, doing everything in your power to become the best version of yourself… you’re not going to have time to compare yourself to others.
You also won’t be worrying if what you’re doing is good enough compared to others. You’re going to damn right know with absolute certainty that what you’re doing is good enough because you’re giving your best focused effort toward becoming the best that you can be.
You’re best effort is always good enough and that’s what you should be focusing on rather than what others are doing.
Time spent comparing yourself to others is wasted time. It’s time that you could have dedicated toward unleashing your own unique greatness and creating your unique legacy.
We all possess unique qualities, traits, gifts, talents, and characteristics. We all have unique perspectives, opinions, and experiences. It’s a shame to suppress your uniqueness.
It’s a shame to conform to the norm, while trying to be like someone else. What the world really needs is for you to allow your uniqueness to shine bright. To simply be you… staying true to yourself, your beliefs, your values, and your passion. To keep it REAL!
Look within to light your fire. What do you want to achieve? What excites the heck out of you? What’s your purpose in life? How can you make a positive impact on this world? What legacy do you want to leave behind? You can’t look outward to answer those questions. The solution is only within YOU!
Yes we can be inspired by others to help step up our own personal game, but resist the urge to compare yourself to them. As Tom Venuto states, compare yourself only to yourself. Doing so will be a constant reminder of just how far you’ve come along on this amazing journey of yours.
I hope that you’ve enjoyed this message and find value in it. I’d love to hear your personal thoughts and experiences with comparing yourself to others. Be sure to share them in the comment box below.
Note: Here’s a video version of this article. If you want to feel my passion for this topic, I recommend you watch it in addition to reading this post.
Sculpt a Masterpiece,
Coach Scott Tousignant